Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Forecasting Eventual Pink Slips: NFL Coaches On The Hot Seat

Since the end of the 2000 season, there have been 62 new head coaches, which makes for an average of 6.88 each year (there’s 11 this year). With that- it would be a good bet that 6 current coaches will be fired by the end of the season.

If only we can wager on this in Vegas…

If I could- here are my picks for coaches who might be poised for the pink slip by season's end:

10) Jeff Fisher: As I pointed out here, if the Titans fail to make the playoffs with Kerry Collins under center, Fisher could (and probably should) be fired. If that happend, Fisher would have only taken the Titans to the playoffs 6 times in 15 full seasons, on top of a 5-6 playoff record. Not that impressive. Plus, Fisher has handled the Vince Young situation terribly. At least Fisher could have a future in the adult film industry!

9) Jack Del Rio: If the Jaguars have two consecutive losing seasons, the Jags might have to reconsider both the Del Rio and Garrard eras.

8) Gary Kubiak: Despite being one of the best back-up quarterbacks in Super Tecmo Bowl, another non-playoff year is probably not going to cut it in Houston. Kubiak is currently sitting at a 22-26 record.

7) Wade Phillips: Dallas is basically just waiting for a higher profile coach to come along. Phillips has secretly done well as a coach (70-49), despite some playoff woes under irregular circumstances. Yet, unless the Cowboys win the Super Bowl, Jerry Jones will find a reason to fire Phillips if a more appealing name becomes available in the offseason.

6) Marvin Lewis: Considering he has a 46-49 record with the Bengals, Lewis has exceeded Cincinnati’s expectations. However, on top of the inner turmoil, and the stalled progress of Carson Palmer- another losing season for Cincinnati will cost Lewis his job.

5) Norv Turner: Expectations and talent are very high in San Diego. Everyone knows that Turner is a major redflag (77-95-1 career record). If San Diego implodes (even an early playoff exit)- Turner will and should be the scapegoat.

4) Brad Childress: As I pointed out in my Vikings preview, I am almost positive Childress’ will cost the Vikings a few critical games this year. Add that to the fact that this will be Favre’s last year (right?), expectations are maybe too high in Minnesota. This puts all of Childress’ lame brain moves in the spotlight.

3) Jim Zorn: Zorn is Washington’s 5th coach since 2000, which exemplifies how little patience Washington's management has. If Washington struggles (which I think they will), perhaps Washington starts over with a new coach and quarterback for 2010.

2) Dick Jauron: In my opinion, one of the worst coaches currently in the league. Buffalo should have fired him by now, and since Buffalo probably won’t make the playoffs- they will most likely finally pull the trigger. Jauron has a career 57-76 record, and as I joked in my AFC preview column, he clearly doesn’t know what he’s doing. Again- For hilarity's sake: Check out how Jauron mistakenly ran the clock out at the end of the second quarter, down 3-0, during last year’s finale at New England’s 12 yard line.

1) Tom Cable: I would put this one at a 100% possibility. Cable should have never been given a head coaching position in the first place. This is a guy who has won 28% of his games in college, coaching Idaho. At least Cable will put up a fight! (zing)

Picks to Be Fired: Cable, Jauron, Phillips, Zorn, Childress, Lewis & (surprise) Fisher


  1. No way Jeff Fisher gets fired. No. Way.

    Rest of the list is spot on.

  2. Reply to Aaron Nagler:

    Thanks Aaron. I would think Fisher would be 25-1 odds in Vegas, right? If Titans miss playoffs though- especially with Collins starting, it's certainly should be in consideration.

  3. I recognize, esp after an offseason where we saw Bowlen fire Shanny, that ownership can cut ties to any coach, no matter how closely aligned they are, at any time. I also realize that the GM may have an itch to bring in 'his own guy'.

    But I still say No. Way. ;)

  4. Wade Phillips will be replaced by his offensive coordinator, who is great friends with Jerry Jones.

  5. Wade Phillips is garbage! Every time he INHERITS a playoff team he can never win the first playoff game. Fire HIM!

    Also, if Josh McDaniels doesn't have a winning season this year, his tenure in Denver will cease in January!